Gardening Jokester T-Shirts

'I'm trying to increase my pocket money... Do you need some Guano to fertilize your garden, sir?'

An Unexpected Guest.

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

"Do you think the birds like me?"

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Annual flower having a mid-life crisis in July

'Well, you always said you wanted a water feature for the garden.'

Man is injured transporting cacti.

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

Gardener digging and finding pipes.

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'It's only a slug Norman.'

"When is it time to stop smelling the roses and suck up the nectar?"

Crazy paving company.

'What if your tree grows, Burl? Won't it choke to death?'

A flower beats up another flower - Genetically Engineered plants tend to be more aggressive than naturally grown ones.

'We want the garden to be stamped with my husband's personality.'

'Be sure to bring home your divots so you can patch the bare spots in our lawn.'

God builds the first lawn mower.

'I love crocuses. They seem to defy the winter snow to let you know spring is coming.'

COWS: Spare cow

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

"You wanted me to mow all the grass?"