Garden Tinkerer Prints

"Hear that? First lawnmower of spring!"

'I know it's overgrown - we can't find our house!'

'Oh, we're just here so Rusty can shop around for a new fence to dig under.'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"Young Frankenstein"

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

The Computer Bore

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

Early cyborg.

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

Timmy has a great future in nano-technology.

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Gadget geek.

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

The Not-So Smart Meter

Bicycle sat nav.

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

Congratulations on your retirement!