Garden Stylist Mugs

'Did you know the gardener also does hair?'

California Gold...field of poppies with matching border

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

"Oh no, it's Flash Garden!"

Burt was a true artist and conservationist. He recycled his beer cans...Making an ornate garden wall and rockery.

"We have a new line of designer hedge funds...the Topiary Group."

'He took a fetching class.'

'Like I'm going to give this up to migrate.'

'Don't wear that shirt in the garden dear. Roses don't fit in with my planting scheme'

"She's had a lot of work done."

'...'Throw down my hair'? In this condition?'

Sophisticated garden - low maintenance garden

The Arcimboldo Arrangement

"The latest news on the gardening fashion front is 'Ditch the decking'!"

"Yeah, most people are surprised when they learn I'm actually a lyricist."

A topiary doghouse

Dun Decking

Chelsea flower show sewage

Topiary bushes in the form of pointing hands. People are looking in the directions that the fingers are pointing.

Hipster Yard

"I like your garden humans"

Decorator Farming

'We thought gnomes would be a little common'.

Gastro Gnomes

'Short back and sides please'

'It's nice when people give Christmas presents that you appreciate.'

Hedge trimming.

'I dunno, Friar Tuck. Sometimes I think I preferred the hidout before our visit from the 'Ground Force' team.'

"They just keep falling. It's as though they're mocking me with their hideous persistence. I know they hate me, hahaha! You'll all be sorry..." "Leaf insanity"

"Just how long has Murray been retired?"

'I guess you could say the church garden is God's bling.'

Unwanted Guests

'Too small for Santa I'm afraid-but with a fishing rod you would be a WOW in our roof garden!'

Topiary chair.