Garden Guerrilla Gifts

"I dread these W.I. meetings

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

Cat in a tank...

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

Bumble Bee

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Biodiversity

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

"Relax. They're just crows."

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

So those are your 'weapons of mass destruction? - Slugs?

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

'...And it comes with valuable coupons toward your next purchase.'

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

'Nothing to worry about, Mr. Jenkins, some people do have a mild reaction to the flu shot!'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

Lawn mower - must get longer cable

'Success! I've just hacked into a supposedly squirrel-proof birdfeeder!'

"Look, they get really mad when I dig up the garden, so, can you please sign this statutory declaration..."

Pesticide Bunny: Mom! Bunny is eating the pesticide sprayed grass again!

"It came... it grew... it made Nana say bad words... 'Ow! You rotten #@!!×!' The invasion of the thistle"

'I couldn't keep squirrels away from my bird feeders, so I called a lawyer!'

In paradise

Dog excited watching a new tree being planted

"These hostas are out of control!"

I think we need stronger slug pellets for the garden!