Gap Grin Enthusiast T-Shirts

I see you wear your teeth parted in the middle.

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

Of all the gin joints in the world, you are here.

"My grandson said I was "woke" but I'm 90% certain I didn't even nod off"

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

Henry's music career was ruined when a frog jumped into a glass of gin, and then jumped into his tuba where it is now permanently lodged.

'He's making preparations for his elderly care.'

Positive Thinking

'...and so begins the generation gap.'

'I suppose you think you're better than your parents, mister I-Can-Walk-Upright?!'

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

Scariest Tactics

Gin & Tonic.

Doug Kenney

London Gin Company Limited - By Appointment to Queen Mother

"I can write beautiful poems, but they all rhyme with gin."

-"For instance, this gin and tonic does not have a single molecule of gin in it!" -"It's from the staff canteen, right!"

'How much gin will I need for three medium size lemons?'

'She's a little upset. Apparently, when the cosmetic surgeon asked her what kind of chin she'd like, she thought he said gin and asked for a double.'

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

Aviation cocktail

'Give me something long and cold and half full of gin. How's the wife?'

Employment law employee swears at the announcement of further lockdown measures.

Baby boomers anthem.

The Cheshire Dog.

'Dr. Vitsky, D.D.S. ... Yes, here you are. Go right on ahead through those pearly whites up there.'

Old man with straw in gin.

'Do you have any experience in wrongful-death cases?'

'Have you seen pictures of those redwood trees with holes big enough for cars to drive through?'

"Jimmy! Guy out here is asking for an 'All The Money In Your Register'. Is that with gin or vodka?"

"Gin before peanuts is an aperitif. After peanuts it's a digestif."

'You have 5 molars.' 'And 6 spaces between them.'

Oliver Twist-of-Lemon