Galentine's Day Gifts

"Who needs men when there's chocolate."

'I was that close to joy.'

"I always seem to attract nutters."

No boyfriend, can't be bothered t-shirt

"Don't talk to me about men they're all the same"

Imaginary boyfriends are best.

'The only thing better than a good friends is a good friend with chocolate. Got any?'

'Mind you, this isn't a secret I'd tell just everybody.'

'I live with grand fantasies Harold.'

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

Selfie Fun

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"I celebrate valentine's gastronomically."

Valentine, Galentine, Palentine

"He sounds like a papaya I bought that just went straight from green to rotten."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

Playing Fetch.

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

You're my Mona Lisa.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

LAY ZEE FUK

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'