Galactic Linguist Prints

"We sent a message to any extraterrestrial beings in deep space. It was picked up by an observatory in Great Britain. They didn't understand it."

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

'Iguana know what time it is.'

'Instead of cubicles, we call them interconnected productivity centres.'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

Questions

"Is there someone other than Trump I can speak to? I didn't come all this way to talk to an idiot!"

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

'This should succeed...it's not aimed at anything.'

'And so thanks to my dad's waistline I now understand the theory of our constantly expanding universe!'

"Do you think it's a form of greeting?"

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

"Here's a blues number I wrote after hat shopping the other day."

'It was definitely a bang. You heard it, I heard it, end of discussion.'

"Let us recall the parable of Jesus turning the other tentacle."

"Tongue twisters! These are hard to say! A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk."

"Are there space-babes?"

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

'He's so clever he's learning a second language!'

Sarah visited the planet Spelling Mistake and met the Spellingmistakians

Serious business

'If the Sun doesn't explode in five billion years, do you realize how foolish we'll look?'

"Are you sure they'll be able to read English?"

'Of course I can spell -- I just can't spell conventionally.'

Expanding Sun engulfs Planets

'Maybe the Universe isn't expanding -- maybe it's just you.'

How's my abducting?