Future Sibling Supporters T-Shirts

"Mommy is having another baby. Let me assure you that any paradigm shift will be incremental, core values remain family-centric, and Mommy is committed to assimilation and building synergy."

At the Museum

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Boy and Bear and Monster

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

Magnet School. A "magnet school"? Won't that mess up the computers?

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

A dog postal worker delivers through a letterbox in a doggy door.

Snooze buttons for cat owners

"Good work Tim, you snatch it all: none of this sharing with your brother nonsense..."

"She's a dachshund-lemming mix."

"Better luck next time, kid."

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

"I'm an oldest child trapped in the body of a middle child."

"Shhh! I'm hiding from Mistress who wants to go on a walk! It's cold and raining outside: no way I'm wearing that stupid coat again!"

I think you meant to huff 'n' puff at the next house over.

The Charge of the Kids

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

Fade to black...

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

"This could be quite boring. No club jumper, no theme song and no pie nights!"

"I don't get it either, but my mom keeps telling me to hang up the phone, so I do it to make her happy."

The Taming of the Ewe

'Is that IT? All this way for just the ONE?'

The noise from the basement was probably nothing – but if it was, she was a sacrifice her older brothers were willing to make.

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.