Future Seeker Pillows

Fortune Teller and Ophthalmologists: 'See the Future' and 'See the Present.'

"You will fall backward. But eventually you will spring ahead."

Horoscope - Look out for Large Windfall (Man crushed by giant apple).

'Shall we get started - You haven't got all day.'

'For $50, I predict your future. Act now and I'll even throw in a few self-fulfilling prophecies.'

"I was looking for a more long range answer than 'Happy Hour.'"

Amateur Palmist

"Sometimes the future is bright, sometimes it's dark - it's all cyclical."

Integration into the EU.

Man see's 'Distribution' in his crystal ball

Would that be 'net' or 'gross'?

Madame Lucille Fortune Teller. "I predict the future."

'Do you see a tall, dark formation of shale oil?'

'I see a palm...A palm crossed with silver...'

You Will Find a Nearby Restaurant!

Your Winning Lottery Numbers Told: 'If they are really what you say - how come you can only afford a tent?'

'... But, in the end that diet will fail, too.'

'I would like you to contact a tall dark and handsome stranger. Object, matrimony.'

'I keep getting his answering machine.'

'According to your love line, I should be calling a cop right now!'

'Someday, you'll be a big star!'

'Do you want tea leaves or the cards?' - 'You mean you don't know.'

"What grade would you like - basic, better or best?"

Bank customers all wait in line for fortune teller.

"You're going on a very short journey."

Cat and the Eight Ball.

"Well, I could go on all night but, sadly, I've just discovered that you can't!"

Fortune Teller using a satellite to help pick up clairvoyant signals.

"How's my life line doing?"

"And you will eventually meet that special someone who doesn't mind doing it doggie style."

"I'm sorry, tallish, swarthy and so-so is the best I can do."

Tarot Lying

"I turn on the bubble machine for good luck. And the distraction of course."

"If I knew next week's winning lottery numbers do you think I'd be sitting here telling you."

"I see love, adventure and happiness coming into my life!"