Future Resume Builder T-Shirts

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

Little Doctor meets Little Geneticists.

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'

"Wow...your resume is quite impressive."

"Your CV will be sufficient, Mr. Cooper."

"You inhabit the body of someone who has an impressive résumé."

'Alright, throw in your resume and the 'Get A Job' potion will be complete.'

"Are all these letters of recommendation from your mother?"

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

'I like the part of your resume where you didn't ask for a raise for 10 years.'

"Everything looks real good...except these long gaps in your work history every winter."

'I'm sorry, but you have a very impressive resume, and at this company, we find competence threatening.'

'Don't worry, he'll soon grow into it.'

"If I'd known you were not looking for experience I wouldn't have lied on my CV."

'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'

'Qualifications aside, Mr Thumb, this is the cutest resume I've ever seen.'

'Any recommendations besides these report cards saying you work well with others?'

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

"My word, this really is impressive! Lots of people have a personal trainer but a personal wine advisor, wow!"

'Next time you want to cheat and use someone else's resume, I suggest you do more than scratch out his name and put yours above it.'

"It says here you can think on your feet. What happens when you sit down?"

'...the job is so much harder when you don't know what you are doing.'

"I'm fascinated by your résumé, particularly the advertising supplement."

"Your curriculum vitae is extremely detailed, isn't it? I don't quite know what to make of the fact that your third-grade teacher, Miss Hartley, made you stand in the corner for throwing an eraser although another kid did it."

'You're hired. Go figure.'

"These references are excellent Mr. Canning. But do you have any from someone other than your mother?"

"Humility is a virtue, but not on a resume."

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

"A Ph.D. in particle physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

'Your resume doesn't contain a single falsehood or stretching of the truth. Sorry, but you're not what we're looking for in our PR department!'

"You say in your resume that you're very meticulous."