Future Realtor Pillows

'Nah, I don't want to play house. Let's go condo instead.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

Jack and Ina build their dream house.

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

'He's going to be an estate agent, just like his Dad.'

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'For Sale by Neighbor'

'We're quite confident this lull won't last long.'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

'I told my wife to run the house like a business. So she sold it to an American corporation.'

Emigrating to France.

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Commerical real estates' man excited by peak in sleeping 'Rental rates' monitor

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

America's funniest investment scams

Rising Housing Costs vs Wages.

'The only means of access was via the previous tenant's hair. But not to worry, there's a ladder 'round the back.'

Home Foreclosed Home.

"Real estate values soar, cute boutiques proliferate, fine cuisine abounds. These are exciting times to live in Hoboken."