Futbol Mugs

"Watch this bloke, lads, if there's a hole in the wall he'll find it."

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

I like the Jets...I guess

Football Fans

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Church for sports worshipers.

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Fly Football

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'Another football scholarship offer?'

Football Chameleon

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

Punt Cake

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

If nobody had invented graphics

The trauma of losing.

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

The Brothers Grime

An 'out of this-world' soccor player stops the penalty his way!