Furry Friend Observer Pillows

'Journey of self-discovery' Dog realizes he can make his leg move when he scratches.

"Pick me!"

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

'It's normal, don't worry, people on the street just love patting puppies...'

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

Beware of the Dog Hair.

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

"Sorry, bud. You know the rules... Dibs is dibs."

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'Next!'

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'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

"Your motivation is that you're a dog and it's food."

"I've been getting really excited about squirrels even when my dog isn't with me."

'Before I undertake my journey, I require you to make me a warrior's headband.'

Puppy.

'He's a tenacious lap dog.'

Lost my squeaky toy. Please help.

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

"That's just not the real me."

"Thanks for your concern, and yes, I'm a rescue dog, but that's my actual job title: I rescue people..."

"Hold my calls for a while, Wilson."

Dog Training.

Dog Love.

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

"I do like it here, but I'm ready for my own apartment."

"It's always so loud during yappy hour."