Fur Mom/dad T-Shirts

"He's always been a little needy, but the despair is new."

'How am I going to tell him he's no longer my best friend?'

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Rusty starts to have very violent thoughts toward his tail.

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'Yes I know I'm intelligent and famous, but I'd trade it all for a good old belly scratching.'

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

Babies vs. Dogs

'Who had the ocean whitefish and tua paté?'

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

Walking the dog - 'surprise'!

'A bone is a bone is a bone...'

'We've tried everything else without success and have now made the decision to adopt.'

Cat Zoom Meeting

"Back when we got him, Rufus was a child substitute. Now he's just a dog."

'That's right...he'll lick you to death.'

"First they taught me how to pee on the newspaper. Then they taught me how to fetch it. I reversed the sequence by accident and I've been out here since."

"Stop asking me. I don't know who's a good boy."

When is he coming home buddy?

"Helen, Don, you're probably wondering why I called you here today. I'm afraid the answer is achingly simple: I can't get down."

'We've GOT to get the bullet out,,,'

"I'm beginning to worry she might work out who is really in charge."

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

'I heard him mention your name, what does neutered, mean?'

'A vet!! Take Princess to a vet?'

'Oh there you are...you naughty girl! What have you been up to this time?'

"And they say WE have a shedding problem!"

"Pampered?"

Cat to owner: 'Define 'affection'.'

"You've got to lay off the homework."