
'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'
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'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'
"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"
'Hole in one!!!!'
"... It's just that, when you said you had a couple of tickets to see the big game..."
'Now, remember...let me do the talking.'
Dedication to excellence....
"Skate or die."
"Slugger goes yard!!!"
'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'
"This does not make us friends."
"You're way too strong Dad: You've overshot the green by about two hundred metres..."
"She's about to get him on the rebound."
Ref shows footballer green card.
'I don't mind being sent off Sir - but not during the warm-up!'
"I'm sorry I called you boring."
'And it looks like the refs are going to call a hard fowl.'
The Puck Stops Here.
'Watch out for the hidden ball trick.'
'I follow my doctor's orders religiously. He said for me to spend two hours a day on the tennis court.'
You Don't Know What It's Like
'I've got a good idea to improve the team.'
Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Racing - No. II - IV
Shows Bundt
Competitive Horse at the Racetracks.
'Sit down, Roger! You're creating drag.'
'I like that guy. He gets a splitting headache, but instead of quitting, he calls time out, the athletic trainer tapes him up, and he gets right back in the game.'
'When I'm in the saddle I'm part of the horse.' - 'Yes, but which part?'
Dragon brought on as substitute
'Tough luck Warren, but it was always going to be hard to get a strike.'
'So then the linebacker yells back at this guy: 'Oh yeah? Well, next play, I'm gonna cram the ball...' Wait! I got it.'
Things you can say about baseball but not your dog...
"I don't know. I just don't think this 'bowling' thing will work."
'Out batted, out bowled, out fielded!'
Ski cannon.
Using a sink plunger to retrieve a golf ball.
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