Funny Home Improver T-Shirts

We have to find one that's big enough to hold our old beat-up can.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Tool Box

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

Conservation Area

Aqua Filter (frog jumping out).

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

A holiday at home

The Hammer

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

The Day Dreamer.

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

'On today's market a property like this could fetch 175k... but with themed rooms, stone cladding, avocado bathroom suite and garden gnomes, you're talking closer to 95..!'

Paint/Paint Remover, Glue/Glue Remover...

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

'Please excuse the mess. The interior decorators are in.'

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

Unicyclist painting a ceiling.

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

'I don't want to be a nuisance, you can shoot me if it's more convenient.'

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

Man's best friend

"When you get a minute, I have some kitchen shelves you can put up."

How to Build a Bungalow

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.