Funny Bone Communicator Pillows

"So if you go on vacation and no one knows about it, did you really go on vacation?"

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

'Reflexes seem normal. You kept him waiting over two hours.'

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

"I don't think I can fit that into my schedule, Irv. I've got a fishing boat to attack this morning, a beach to terrorize this afternoon and a feeding frenzy this evening!"

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

Punkins

'The program is stupid, primitive, embarrassing, and boring. I want to buy a new telly.'

Stand-up comic/ceo: 'A funny thing happened on the way to the board meeting...'

"I speak Latin, you know."

'Modern romance'

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

'Is it okay to apologize for something I'm going to do?'

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

"You want to be a comedian? You can't be serious!"

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

School nativity. Boy says: 'If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this drama ...'

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

Runs-With-Scissors Boy - Part One

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

You make me feel more like a veterinarian than a psychiatrist, Al. Why is that, Dr. Kapuchnik? Because you're one sick puppy.

By teaching the parrot a few key phrases, Marilyn no longer needs to nag her kids.

'Turns out medicine is the best medicine.'

'You know me, I'm a problem solver. I listen. I flirt with understanding. I move on.'

"Our forensic scientist quit, so our computer guy has stepped in for now."

'Will you marry me if I can get funding?'