Fun With Absurdity T-Shirts

A production line adds condiments to cars

Escalator World

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"I need to tinkle."

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"Now you can send it."

You don't need to believe EVERYTHING you are told.

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

'Miss Jones, take this down.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

UFO and snowman

Baseball.

Operation.

'Did anyone hand in a mature stilton last week?'

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

Salome on Settle (also called Maitresse d'Orchestre) - intended for book but suppressed

'Bad as this may look, it's actually the perfect accompaniment with your entree.'

'Ok, now if everyone could just hold still.'

The sudden extinction of Neanderclowns

Magnet at scrapyard

"Yes, but can your philosophical speculations on existence also be relative to why I crossed the road?"

''Tough crowd in tonight!''

The Hypnotato,

Trapeze artists commuting

The Bonvoy Age...

A patient, a doctor and a deep sea diver

A headless man puts up a poster for his lost head.

Albert should have known that cactuses rarely have change. Besides, they prefer jazz.

"I was going to call you but I remembered I left some empty oxygen canisters on Mt. Everest."