Frugivory Pillows

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

Advocado

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

"In the current market, it's just more practical."

'It's cheaper than gas.'

'I'm here to fix your robotic milker.'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"One silo is for grain, the other is for the money we save on gas."

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

Runner Bean...

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

'How much did you save this year?'

Doris was determined to save money on cat parlour fees!

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

What's the insect de jour?

"I think we can take you off the cabbage diet now"

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

"Is that neat whisky?"

Artichoking victim

"I think the milk's off!"

"In my previous life I was arugula."

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."