Friendly Rival Pillows

'The grudge match.'

"I couldn't disagree with you more. I think yours in greener."

"I love spending time together as a family. It brings us together. It makes us stronger. It helps us understand each other."

Golf Eventuality

'I always kept up with my neighbors, the Joneses. I followed them down the path to bankruptcy.'

"Do you mean to say that, for the last fifteen years, we've been trying to keep up with each other?"

An Archeologic Dig

"Will you stop saying I hit a birdie on that last hole! Is it my fault that bird flew into the path of my ball?"

Ha Ha! Better Luck Next Time.

"Come on Frank. I didn't mean to catch a bigger fish than you."

Woman bragging about her big fish, husband with small fish.

'My favorite team is whoever is playing his favorite team.'

Tension filled the tent.

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Mixed Doubles.

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"Things got heated with the Morgans. I may have wagered our car. You're up."

'You play ball with me and I'll play ball with you!'

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

"That fish may be bigger, but I caught more."

'As your doctor, I'd strongly advise that you not laugh at your wife when you beat her at tennis!'

The Rivalry Begins

"Yin and Yankee fan"

'Her next door is LIVID - her husband's only got a septic big toe!'

"My family clapped louder than your family!"

Tug the Toggle

Men painting red and white.

"Very well, Carter, you've proven my theory faulty—let it go at that!"

"I never got a chance to say 'Shut up.' "

"Ken does know that isn't real money, right?"

Squash Partners.

'Want to have a snow ball battle?'

Competitions.