Friend Who Is Getting Married Mugs

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

'...till death, or a really huge argument over ringtones, do you part.'

"Yes ... no!"

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

"Till death us do part? Don't be so bloody morbid!"

'I'm afraid we can't deliver your baby until your CRB check comes through.'

"I didn't realise it could be so complicated!"

"Wow! According to this if I dig straight down I'll find a delivery suite."

Childbirth and Covid 19

Popular college book: How to say 'Send money' in 101 languages.

"Remember when we used to wonder whether to kiss on the first date?"

"There you go again, withdrawing into your shell..."

'Don't you be dissing the Ho' now!'

'She didn't marry him for his looks or personality - she needed his debts for a tax write-off!'

"My favourite part of the wedding ceremony was when the minister said "repeat after me"..."

"This is all so ARBITRARY!"

"Can the bride refrain from twitching her entire left side?"

"Keep pushing, I can see the head!"

'I told you we should have packed a lunch.'

They said it would never last. Even the photographer used a disposable camera.

The Happiest Hen in Abingdon.

"Henpecked?! Don't get me started about being hen-pecked buddy!"

"We don’t care if it’s a boy or a girl, as long as it’s not annoying."

"And do you promise to love, honour, and give me all your personal information that I can pass on to third parties..."

"I wasn't cheating. He's just peer mentoring and doesn't know it."

"If you like the baby pictures you should see the 'Making Of' video!"

"Baby's First Book of Retirement Planning...?"

Hard Hat Area: Marriage Guidance Bureau.

'I feel sorry for you single people. Nobody to go home to fight with.'

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'