Fresh Air Aficionados Pillows

'No need to drive me to school, I can walk.'

'When I need to think better, I just step outside.'

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

No pollution! It's a good day to get my eco-nut sister's present. What is it? Something she's agitated for all year. Where are we going? Here's good. She's so lucky. Not everyone gets fresh air for Christmas!

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

"As some of you may have guessed I got yesterday's sunburn factor wrong!"

Walkers

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

Chilly baby.

"He's been downgraded to a Category One."

Bull charging a fisherman

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

'I try and humour him...it's the only exercise he gets!'

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

Weather today.

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

Couple putting baby through the scanner.

Elephant seeking fresh air

'They're out there, they swallow your stuff, and who're you gonna call?'

Clean air.

Canute Does It Again

'We'd like to start by boarding anyone with hot food they've been waiting to eat on the plane.'

'Now I understand why people want to give them up.'

Minnesota Weather.

'Mind if I open a window? It's a balmy day.'

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

"Cold today, continued cold tomorrow and 100% chance of cold through Wednesday..."

"I'm only wearing one globe because the weather forecast said that toay it might be warm, but on the other hand it might be cold."

The countryside haircut gets quite the haircut at this time of year, doesn't it?

The President Is Unhinged Yet We Aren't All Dead Yet and That's Kind of Amazing

"What do you have to do to get business class?"

It is the primitive joy of hunting wild creatures.

"The fog is thick, but so tender you can cut it with a fork."