Formula One Pillows

Formula One snail

'It's not fair...Schumacher gets to practice a lap of honour before the race has even begun.'

'We'll have you practising in a milk float in no time!'

Formula One

'No, the sound isn't turned off, it's a Formula One race.'

'Looks like Ed Miliband's attempt to stop the race failed.'

Race Starter stuck to whell of racing car

Formula One Venice

'Apparently she looks stunning naked'

'1 and 2. . .1 and 2.'

Micheal Schumacher.

'They must practice their pit stops for hours to get it as badly wrong as that.'

Formula One Earth day

Racing road signs

Engine blown - Swear box.

Formula One Finish Line.

Dad, for successful Formula One drivers, it's necessary to have enough space for commercial batches!

'I had to shoot him, he was cheering for Vettel throughout the whole race.'

Grand Prix winner drinking all the champagne.

Alain Prost

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

"I need to tinkle."

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

'Hi....I'm on my driving test....'

"Figured out who should bat cleanup yet, Skipper?"

Pit Stop for Track and Field

F1 drivers saluting a checkered flag

Bahrain F1

"Change down you fool! You can't hit a hairpin at that speed!"

'...Or not.'

Pit crew fix a tire swing

The word gets out trains are using F1 technology to improve reliability.

"It needs more science and less fiction."

Michael Schumacher