Foodies On A Budget Gifts

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

'Would it be cruelly ironic to shape our new cholesterol medication like little eggs?'

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

'Waiter, you seem to have mixed my bill up with somebody who wants to buy this restaurant.'

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'

"...and the King Cholesterol Meal comes with a side order of CPR."

"How much of this stuff can I eat before it can no longer be returned?"

Ordinarily I'd suggest we'd talk our way out...If only we weren't so God damn tasty!

TV dinners: regular and widescreen

"There. Straight from the organic veggie patch. The world's most expensive carrot."

'When I said you should complain about your steak I didn't mean whining about it on twitter.'

Mom's Diner: "Just like mom used to make."

Sushi For Men...

'We're having leftovers again. Don't worry, I shaved off all the fuzzy parts. I'm going to knit you a sweater.'

The cake diet.

Soup on a stick

'Hang on a minute, the small print says: 'Endorsed by the French Government'...'

"Tell your chef I'd like something for a refined and cultured palate. For under ten bucks."

"We need milk, eggs, bread, cheese. Underline cheese."

'Genuine Venutian Bistro.'

"But is it Organic?"

"Guys, guys! Let's take this from the top. Who ordered the chicken nuggets...?"

Camper special! PORK 'N' BEANS...50 gallons...only $49.99...Limit: 3 per customer.

"We use the cheapest ingredients and pass the savings on to you."

Meatball of the Gods.

'I'm afraid we've reached the point where we have to cut out luxuries. How do you feel about food?'

Multi-Functional

Posh restaurant - 'We'll have the sandwiches.'

Pizza By The Slice

"Are you the Maitres d'? Can you recommend a species?"

'This is from our diet menu. We replaced the starchy bun with two deep fried fish filets!'

"Mmmmmm....meat and two veg!"