Foodie With A Smile Pillows

'I love this job because you customers always smile when you place your order!'

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"That's it. We’re toast."

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"And we are proud to say we only use the freshest artificial ingredients."

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

"Everything tastes better when it's cooked on the grill."

How about going easy on the carbs

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

Advocado

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Flying sauces.

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."