Foodie Conductor Prints

Musical Cook

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

Competitive Eating Competition Competitive Vomiting Competition,

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

"Charles didn't like tofu."

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

Bedtime Stories with Gordon Ramsay

Do-it-yourself sushi bar serves live fish to customer.

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

F&E Diner. I'll bet you want the alphabet soup, right? Hey! Don't put words in my mouth!

You are what you eat (Nuts).

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

NASA, 'I thought YOU were bringing a can opener!'

The mission: Impossible burger.

Uncle Giving Boy a Mince Pie

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

"Butcher a tune for you today, ma'am?"

Bagel problems.

"Obviously, sir, it's a very discerning, vegetarian fly."

"My lord, Sir Arthur is pleased to bid thee welcome to his food court."

'The escargots are underdone.'

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'