Food Realist Mugs

A fridge surrounded by books.

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

View to the Future

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

'Your salary will help you learn the lesson that life is not fair.'

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Surprise in the salad bowl

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"What does the time traveler do when he's hungry? Go back four seconds."

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"Is it free-range?"

Fast Food Dieter

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"Not bad, but it has a sort of plastic aftertaste."

The Politics of Food.

"They have oat fiber, wheat fiber, and rice fiber, but no moral fiber."

'What do you have that hasn't been cloned?'

"First you make a roux."

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

Taken genetic engineering too far

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."