Fluffy Fiction Lover Gifts

"What if my inner demons want to write about bunnies?"

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

"Say hello to my little friend."

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

'Yes Mr Hare, you were right: He IS on steroids!'

Sumo Love.

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

Pinocchio Vs. Dracula

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

"If you don't make up your mind who's taking me out, I'll do it right here."

I'm ridiculously small. My nose is huge. I have ears like a jackass... Manic depressive with low elf esteem.

Stephen King

"El muy mal perro"

"Your grandma and I have decided to live together."

Living with a cataholic.

'The owner would have shown you around himself, but he doesn't rise untill after sunset.'

'I hear he's quite a recluse - doesn't even have a blog.'

Vampire shaving cut dilemma.

'Who's that painted lady?'

"There's no need to howl at every moon we pass by."

'Of course I like to base all my characters on real life. For instance the fat useless guy in my last novel was you!'

Sun. Rain.

Persian

Begin by removing all surplus mud.

'I like to spend my train journeys reading fiction.' (He looks at Rail Timetable. Sign says 'Delays expected'.)

William Tell meets Carmen Miranda.

"Unlike the case for dogs, the people that cats own don't grow to look like them. I mean, seriously, what human could look as good as this?"

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'I've never met such a heartless, gutless and brainless board of directors!'

"Wow! Talk about a game-changer!"

"And the lovely, little daughter understood her daddy was tired from harvesting people's personal data all day and went to sleep. The end."

Hook couldn't believe he hadn't thought of inviting his brother, Captain Flyswat, before.

"I thought this would be easier than a drawn-out political campaign."

"What the hell was in that?!"