Flexible Foodie Gifts

'If I can touch my toes I can touch dessert.'

Man eating his meal with his feet.

"My veganism begins and ends with eating insects."

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

'Hey, honey bun!'

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"It's not what you think."

Stand back - while I whip something up

"Robot waiters are OK, but I just wish they wouldn't hover so."

'STOP! You're injecting the wrong GMO gene!'

'I recommend looking down your wife's top, sir.'

Salad Hat

Proponent of good diet and vigorous exercise - Mr. Tramp does admit to an occasional sweet...

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

'This part of your office's new flexible-work-from-home-schedule?'

"Would you like to try the Sculpt & Shred or Blast & Burn?"

"If dinner was a reality TV show broccoli would be the first thing I'd vote off!!"

'Chair Pose' - 'Utkatasana' - 'Mountain Pose' - 'Tadasana' - 'Standing Forward Bend' - 'Kissmyasana'

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

A Donut Ride Outside of a Police Station

'I just need enough to send my Dad to cookery lessons!'

'Flexible working can lead to many benefits, increased productivity, reduced travel expenses, lower stress levels and most importantly...Henry gets to go on more walks.'

"Set phazers to medium rare!"

When I see you I turn to jelly!

'I'll trade you, sight unseen.'

"I'm looling for ground beef that's organic, non-GMO, and doesn't contain meat."

'After 25 years of research we've concluded that you should just eat, drink and be merry.'

'Waiter - This salad isn't appropriately dressed!'

From the Big Book of Childhood Realizatons: No. 3,271

"Tuna on rye, hold the smile."

Snowperson Yoga

'Working from home is great! You can keep your mind occupied watching daytime TV.'

"I'm a big devotee of fasting."