Flamboyant Soul T-Shirts

"Yeah, the colourful display works OK I guess, but I play it cool and enigmatic, and believe me, it works..."

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

Busy man, busy life, busy shirt.

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

A Macaroni in 1772

"Ok, so you beat me at scrabble!"

Frizzbee statue.

You know, the snowballs we get in the summer are better. They're flavored!

"Of course I'm bored - my batteries are flat!"

The Dandy

'That must be the 'Jolly Roger' they're always on about.'

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

"On second thoughts, I'll have it stirred, not shaken."

'I do so much better with women when I quit trying to understand them and just repeat what they say to each other.'

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

Bunny Pranks

'My girl friend wants me to put my inner child back inside where he belongs.'

'Yes, John's here, but he can't come to the phone at the moment. He's had a hard day so he's taking some time in his bouncy saucer.'

Shoe repair

"Ladies, you know the rule about joyriding."

Attention Span Man

'Now while you're cranking the Jack in the Box Tommy, I want you to tell me your thoughts.'

The Most Interesting Dog in the World. . .

Elton John

"It's always a good time to have a good time!"

"Yes, dear. I'm pretty sure it's 'granny panties on the inside, pants on the outside.'"

Face painting - children have no faces

"Lisa, your playdate is here!"

"Stripes weren't dazzling enough?"

'This is me at my most masculine.'

"Pretty Maiden where art thou?"

"Is this a sex thing?"

Medical Student

Snowballs!

"Hold on - 1...2...3...?"