Fitness Flop Pillows

'He sprained his wrist inserting the exercise DVD.'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

In the Guru District

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

'My feet are killing me.'

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

Dog Walking Services

"Portrait of a Lady"

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

Yoga for Alcoholics

'Well, well, well...'

On the back of the t-shirt...

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

Muscles

"This feels like an accomplishment."

Turn, turn and turn.

Be Healthy

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'