First-world Warriors T-Shirts

White middle class riot.

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

"I have a huge house, millions in the bank, and a twenty year old wife. But am I happy?..."

"Motivational seminars are too expensive. Just buy stronger coffee."

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

"O.K., she's sitting fown to write in three...two....one...."

Personnel. Any experience in crisis management? No...Just production.

"Sure, money may be imaginary - but at least it's got everybody imagining it."

"Here's what you wanted – a strategy to live abundantly, build capital, surpass your peers and disappoint your heirs."

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

The Secret Sauce of American Exceptionalism

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

Resume Dumpers

'Our short-term solution is money. Our long-term solution is more money.'

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of dealing with emergency plumbing problems are the hardest.'

Alfred Marquez, Probate Attorney - Heir club for men.

Man climbs a ladder only to find the word HELP.

Run, Mike, Run!

'Of course, you realise my chief of staff has more power and influence than your chief of staff.'

Studio in December

"I've accepted that I'm getting richer."

"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"

"All those years of dodging taxes and chasing investment yield have kept me in top shape, right?"

Joan hits the glass ceiling: 'Sorry, but I've decided to go with Wally of Arc...'

Congratulations on Receiving Your Vaccine Doctor

"Well, we could just tell everyone we have an indoor pool!"

'I can't figure out whether I'm a secretary or an executive - I do executive work, but get secretarial pay.'

"I'm addicted to water."