First Boyfriend Pillows

"So you found the perfect guy?"

"If you have a boyfriend, I have some advice, young lady! Wisdom that's been handed down from generation to generation!"

"Have you told your dad about your new boyfriend?"

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

You're my Mona Lisa.

Killer Executive Suits.

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Talk nerdy to me."

LAY ZEE FUK

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"What's a patent?"

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

So Close..

"I don't love you. That's it in a nutshell."