Finding A New Job Gifts

Manager Jerry Kindale had found a simple, direct way to fire employees.

'The position sounds interesting, but my last job paid more coconuts.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

Killer Executive Suits.

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'I have this fear of the real world...'

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Carefree luggage.

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

Reach for the Star.

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

We should take a break. Ron's eyes have turned into spinning rainbow wheels.

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"He's having a hard time finding work."

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Pipe Dream.

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

Surfing the daily stress

She was warned. Nethertheless she persisted.

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.