Financial Secretary Pillows

'Financial secretary gone 'round the bend, or Odalisque with Balance sheet, that is the question.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

Copycats

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

Out and In.

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

Storm in the out tray

37 years in the same position.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'Apparently, Smith's desk just couldn't withstand the weight of the paperwork we piled on his desk.'

Here and There Trays

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

'Salaries Manager. No.'

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"Morning, all!"

Someone who knows apostrophes

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Today is the tomorrow I feared yesterday. . .'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."