Financial Satire Fan Pillows

'You're too late...I embezzled it.'

'So I charged a few billion gifts last year. I was going to pay it later.'

"You sound familiar. Haven't I swindled you once before?"

"Well, I guess the bubble has burst over at Phillips Rodny Associates."

'The new phone system automatically shuts down if someone says we owe them money.'

'You know I'm beginning to think that bank that bought us out were asset strippers.'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

"Empty the cash drawer, but keep 15% for withholding!"

'We've had a marginal advance-decline on a near-term buy-out, but no one knows if that translates as a downturn or an up-tick.'

FSA sees mortgage lenders as drug dealers says Council of Mortgage Lenders

'But hey, it's only money.'

Independent Financial Advisor

'Here's a little blues song I wrote about lost tax loopholes and lost entitlements.'

'Pension fund performance, please give generously.'

"Appeal for donations: Please donate lots of money to poor man Musk so he can afford Viagra!"

Golden bubbles

The Cities Taxpayers - do you have any collateral?

'My case flow was coming along fine, and then I CAPSIZED.'

Greece - Capital Flight

'Interest in our Payday loan story has increased dramatically overnight.'

"In this company, GDP stands for gree, deception and profit."

'I'm sorry but Mr. Glass is away from his desk.'

"Excuse the mess, sir, but this is what happens when the Feds won't let us pay bonuses!"

Going for Broke

"We missed a payment on your exorcism, you're being re-possessed."

Greek Crisis

"When you think about it, we stocks and bonds salesmen seem to have some things in common with Somali pirates."

"This company was founded on the principles of empowerment and shared equity. A bankruptcy and re-org fixed that particular problem."

Small Loan Dept.

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

"Maybe what's good for Wall Street isn't good for Main Street, but it's great for Tribeca."

"After years of low level burglaries, Robin Hood started to steal from the rich using a sophisticated Ponzi scheme."

'Are you sure it's necessary to sign this part declaring 'all information is true and correct to the best of my knowledge'?.'

'Finally, something we all understand.'