Financial Literacy Advocates T-Shirts

"Help! Spent it all on self-help books."

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

"And we will absolutely start lending again as soon as we finish building our debtors' prison."

"I had that nightmare again where everyone found out I'm in my late thirties and still have no idea how the stock market works."

'What does it say, Dad?'

'The Truth-in-advertising people want us to call ourselves the 'Sluggish Fund Group'.'

Finally I understand why it's called 'Higher Education!'

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

"I don't get an allowance. I get earnings per share."

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

"Cold drinks" "Tesla stock"

'Order fast, folks - the prices have an expiration date.'

"The time has come to talk of many things; of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of double-entry bookkeeping, too."

"Now you know how Daddy feels when Mommy overdraws the checkbook."

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

Low standard of living

Wall Street In Jail

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

"The scammers managed to clear out your entire pension fund."

Spell-Check Bee

'Any time you need more, the money tree is here.'

'My own debit card would really be a great way to teach me the value of a dollar.'

'Is my allowance a form of income redistribution?'

'I don't know what to do about my check - grief or anger counseling.'

"Uh, Dad, I appreciate the 'walkin' around money,' but I need 'walkin' around New York City money.'"

They stole your identity, but after seeing your credit score, they gave it back.

"I don't know man. It sounds a lot like a pyramid scheme to me."