Financial Enthusiasts Pillows

'We're worried about your ability to lend us money.'

The Tooth Accountant

'Giving back to the community is an excellent tax write-off strategy.'

'We don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's a tax deduction.'

"Well, if I shouldn't invest with my emotions, whose emotions should I invest with?"

"It covers up all the debt."

'What I really want for my birthday is a first baseman's mitt, all I get is paper...'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Profit

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

'We're under capitalized. As soon as we reach the break even point we'll buy a lemon.'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

'Good news! Our nest egg is developing into a double yoke.'

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

"#Win!"

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

'He's downgrading the credit agencies.'

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'