Financial Adjustment Pillows

'Dan lost his job in October, but we've made some lifestyle changes that have helped to compensate for the drop in income.'

'Hopefully these sessions will help you to adjust to flying economy.'

"I'll go back to school if you go back to the office."

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

'Do you remember the good old days when April 15 was the only 'fiscal cliff' people worried about?'

"Oh c'mon, Phil. Everyone knows we only stay together for the giant tortoise."

"I need to recover from working from home with the family around me 24 hours a day. . . that's why I'm living here in the office for a while."

"I don't believe it...are you actually flying somewhere?"

'We try to only make bad loans to good people.'

'When does a tax increase not sound like a tax increase?'

Cost of Terror.

Things I didn't know about before 2020.

'Here's where we went wrong - you applied for chapter 11, but you only qualify for chapter 6!'

"We had our identities stolen, and they took everything!"

tax rises...

Useful vs. Wasteful Spending . . . Arts Programs and Missile Defense Programs.

Just Married

'He is having trouble adjusting to the new normal.'

'Consumer income takes a new hop ... Inflation... takes a new high-jump!'

'We didn't make out so well in the last round of budget cuts.'

'You have 17 creditors that won't get paid this month.'

"This is Pierre. He's our new 'Oui' man."

Newly Non-Mega-Rich

'Our accountant says we're going broke. What should we do?' - 'Hire an economist. They also get it wrong.'

"According to these calculations, you have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of the afternoon."

"How weird is it to be finally getting out again?"

You were right, I was silly to worry about some 'boy wonder' taking my job- the boss' daughter got it.

New Patch Available! Reduce your appetite for taxing and spending!

Things to do. Break even.

'Money doesn't grow on trees y'know'

Too bad you had to cancel your party. . .

'I remain confident we will pull out of this nose dive.'

'From the neck up, I worry about credit card debt. From the neck down I worry about fat debt.'

Zen And The Art Of Bankruptcy

'I'm tired of wading around in the shallow end of the gene pool.'