Film Viewing Prints

Previews: They get longer and longer until. . . there is no movie.

The movie is so bad the server recommends ventilation.

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

Billy. The Kid.

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"Bloody hell!"

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

Dancing with the Star Wars

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

The Da Vinci Cod

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

Kirsten Johnson

DVD extras - the making of the boxed set.

"'Tis but a scratch — in America, I'd still have to go in for work today."

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

"WOW...this 50.1 theatre sound system makes you feel you're actually in the movie!"

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

Queen Kong