Festive Flatterer Pillows

"If you want more presents, tell Santa he looks thinner in person."

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

May your Christmas be full of harmony

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

Santa knows he has to be more careful. One more accident due to pilot error, and the FAA would take away his pilot's license for good.

Violin family at Christmas

The New Year's Dance

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

"A raise? You want me to give you a raise? Do I look like f*ckin' Santa Claus?"

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

Well, the doctor confirmed that it's not Rosacea.

'Leave the Iranian airspace at once!'

Santa Randy was fired and Santa Claus got the job.

'For my family, Christmas and New Year's Eve is the busiest time... my husband is a spirits dealer and my son is an emergency doctor!'

Christmas Flights

Snowman carrot substitute.

"The cookies are always stale."

'It looks like Reindeer!!'

Father Christmas stuck on plane wing

"That's right, Robert. Santa sends us a copy of his naughty and nice list, and we send him our students' grades."

Pucker up!

Cow asks the horse for the carrot.

"I don't know about you Mavis but I'm Mullered."

Snowball Fight With Santa

'I understand that you only use your vehicle once a year, Mr. Claus, but you drive over a million miles that night. That's why your premium is so high.'

'Sometimes Rudolph, I can't help but feel Christmas is getting too complicated!'

New York City Santa with huge bag hails cab.

'Frankly, I think his caroling was better before he launched a solo career.'

I brake for Jetliners.

"My dad didn't get what he wanted for Christmas, so he went into his usual rage-display! So embarrassing..."

'Moon Jumper One, you are entering restricted Christmas airspace. ABORT!;

"I guess he IS telling the truth.... Well, Merry Christmas, Santa! Have a good flight."

"It's going to be tight making all of these 873 connecting flights tonight."

'Where were you on the night of October 31st?'