Female Workers Pillows

Wal-Mart Ruling

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

Leadership suits you

"I hate performance review season."

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

'The boss put his picture up to enspire us. But it just isn't having that effect on me.'

"What's a nine-letter word for biotechnology?"

'What's the matter... you're not grim here?'

"They found a use for that old paper shredder."

"I'll be glad when they invent PowerPoint."

The Reaper's Arms

'I'm not worried about losing my job. I'm worried about keeping it.'

"Ms. Ray, you're getting a promotion! You're no longer my Gal Friday. You're now my Gal Saturday."

'I'm still not sure HOW it happened. One minute, we were bouncing ideas off each other, and the next thing I knew, we were using furniture instead!'

'Your resume seems in order, Mr. Lupo, but would you explain exactly why you want to work here> Mr. Lupo...?

'I'd also like to welcome Henderson here, who joins us through Equal Opportunities for the undead.'

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

"Ambitions... to make a career change from tourism to sales."

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

Night-shift entrance

"The days of 'herding cats' are over: my friends and I meet through video-conferencing now..."

Boss to employee: 'I'm downsizing your paycheck.'

'Look! It's superwoman...and all her assistants!'

'Your job description is fairly simple: Stay in your cubicle and try not to make things worse.'

'Remember the old days, when all of this was phallocentric?'

'I will never cease to be amazed at how deftly she balances the demands of career and family.'

"I'm sorry, but Fred isn't available. He's spending a few days in the penalty box for not being a good team player. May I help you?"