Fasting T-Shirts

'Let's ease into this -- I want you to try fasting between meals.'

"I can see from your Machzor annotations that you've really connected with the Ideas of Yom Kippur."

Giving Things Up For Lent.

"I couldn't decide what to give up for Lent, so I gave it all up."

Life In The fast Lane: '24 hours without food is a long, long time...'

"During Lent we must share with poor children what we have in abundance."

'I'm not hungry.' - 'How's the fasting going?' - 'Not good. I can't stop thinking about food.' - Why are you looking at me funny?' - 'Oh, this isn't good.'

"Fasting means you stop eating. It doesn't mean to eat your food faster."

"I lost 15 lbs fasting!"

"I can't take any more! I'm so hungry and thirsty! When will this fast end?!!"

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

'I seriously doubt if you've attained Nirvana yet - You've only been fasting and meditating for fifteen minutes.'

The Janopause

The Penultimate Temptation of Christ

'He's conscientious about most of his religious duties, but he's slow to fast.'

The Fast Diet

Couple discussing fasting

Jesus is tempted in the desert.

"You keep impeccable time."

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

"I'd rather eat your homework."

'So this is goodbye then!'

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

Drive-thru Church

Parent is going to elaborate lengths to get the baby to eat.

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'

"I think what I love most is the smile on her face as she feeds me!"

Baby with straw to eat out of bib.

'Can't one eat in peace!'

"Compared to that regurgitation phase, this is fine dining."

'Are you trying to tell me that neither of you get penalty rates for the 2 a.m feed?'

"Fill it up!"

What will I do with it? It will never fit in the microwave.

Noel Fever

Cat wakes up owner demanding to be fed.