Fashionista's Nightmare Prints

Bad Bad Day

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Middle-Age Superheroes

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

"But everyone else gets to market their own personal scent!"

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

'It makes a cutting edge fashion statement, plus it has room for a gas mask and compact bio hazard suit.'

'They're pinching my toes!'

Salad Hat

"Welcome to Vanity Workshop. For the next thousand years you're to read out the size labels you've removed from your clothing."

'I can just make it out. She's saying 'call my hairdresser'.'

"Everyone who cares about you is here, Frank, because we all feel it's time you quit wearing your baseball cap backwards."

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

As his hearing worsened, Larry had to buy louder and louder clothes.

"Whatever you do, DON'T go in there! It's the mummy's purse!"

Coffee cup lids that don't fit properly and then dribble dwon the front of your best outfit just before the big meeting.

"My dad says at some point in your life, fashion isn't important anymore. You basically wear nylon slacks and guayaberas every day."

'This is Hell, madam. Everything you try on will make your butt look big.'

"How weird is it?"

'Gorgeous or gorging, why do I always have to choose?'

Sue began to wonder if she needed a spending review of her own.

Fears

"We're pretty wiped. In one day, we summitted Gucci, Fendi, Comme des Garcon, Louis Vuitton, and Century 21."

The grim reaper tries on new clothes

'I guess that's why they invented gravity.'

"Wow. I need either new glasses or a new hairdo."

Shop assistant looking at woman wearing a hideous outfit while her shadow is sick in a bucket.

'Anything to take those shoes off.'

'Hazmat suits are the new normal.'

Minimal Chic.

Men wearing loud shirts are the first loaded onto airplane.

Man buying a mourning-band from a hatter

'Sorry that you can't take it with you, but without the sales receipt, you can't get a refund either.'

"My consumer confidence has been replaced with consumer sarcasm."