Fashion Fail Fixer Gifts

"You have some serious bed hair, Dear."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Waiting for Pants

"Honestly sometimes I'd like to pretend I don't know you!"

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

The Bland Leading the Bland

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

"Mmm..I haven't worn this tie since the firms 1997 dinner and dance..."

"You might consider new socks as well."

"You have it backwards. When you're having an online meeting, you're supposed to look good from the waist up."

"It's an important interview, so you probably shouldn't wear a necktie that contains more material than your suit."

'Bob, you're suffering from embarrassing static cling.'

"It's not a cummerbund. It's my underpants."

"What do you recommend for yellow teeth?"

'I would've dressed better, but my tie was dirty.'

"Sorry, sir, but we have a strict dress code."

'We need someone who dresses as badly as you and has an ability to accept criticism...are you interested in the job, jerk?'

'What do you mean, I don't match? Everything I'm wearing is wrinkled.'

"I know, but my mom knitted it for me."

'Maybe you could get dressed faster if you lost that speed bump around your waist.'

"Dad."

'Well he said my outfit clashed, and dang if it didn't get me sorta hot. Although in retrospect, I can see what he meant.'

'Oh, so when you said wear a...Ok, now I get it.'

Cargo briefs

"You wear a necktie with a suit jacket and white socks with brown shoes?? The guy who shot you did it absolutely right!"

"That's not 'smart casual'."

'You are a fool...I said 'Why don't you wear a BANDANA!'

Embarrassed man finds a skimpy dress in his suitcase.

"Darling - I can't seem to find the invisible menders..."

"For the hundredth time, you snip a lose thread you don't pull it."

"So you didn't get the neck-a-chief memo?"