Fashion Fail Fixer Gifts

"You have some serious bed hair, Dear."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Waiting for Pants

"Honestly sometimes I'd like to pretend I don't know you!"

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

The Bland Leading the Bland

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

F&E Designs. My reversible jacket didn't turn out very well.

It's too hard to clean my closet. Take out everything. Throw them into "keep", "donate" or "toss" boxes. Ok. Done!

"Mmm..I haven't worn this tie since the firms 1997 dinner and dance..."

"You have it backwards. When you're having an online meeting, you're supposed to look good from the waist up."

"It's an important interview, so you probably shouldn't wear a necktie that contains more material than your suit."

"You might consider new socks as well."

'Bob, you're suffering from embarrassing static cling.'

"It's not a cummerbund. It's my underpants."

'We need someone who dresses as badly as you and has an ability to accept criticism...are you interested in the job, jerk?'

'What do you mean, I don't match? Everything I'm wearing is wrinkled.'

"Sorry, sir, but we have a strict dress code."

"I know, but my mom knitted it for me."

"What do you recommend for yellow teeth?"

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Dang it! My pants must've shrunk in the dryer. . . Ok. . . who's responsible for shrinking all of my slacks?!!'

'I would've dressed better, but my tie was dirty.'

"These instructions are useless. Keep up the good work."

'Maybe you could get dressed faster if you lost that speed bump around your waist.'

"Dad."

'Oh, so when you said wear a...Ok, now I get it.'

'Well he said my outfit clashed, and dang if it didn't get me sorta hot. Although in retrospect, I can see what he meant.'

"Darling - I can't seem to find the invisible menders..."

"You wear a necktie with a suit jacket and white socks with brown shoes?? The guy who shot you did it absolutely right!"

"That's not 'smart casual'."

Embarrassed man finds a skimpy dress in his suitcase.

Cargo briefs

Dry Cleaners. My cup runneth over again…..

'You are a fool...I said 'Why don't you wear a BANDANA!'

"For the hundredth time, you snip a lose thread you don't pull it."