Fantasy Draft Pillows

"Yeah, but I had Goliath on my fantasy league team."

"But in my fantasy business league I'm making millions."

"Fellow graduates, when I look at you, I see future princesses, ninjas, wizards, superheroes, and zombies."

"I'm going to shoot some hoops with members of the Flat Earth Society."

Deregulated Baseball

'We're in a fantasy team owners' league, we locked out our players and came here to yuck it up.'

Paradise FC: The Blessed Y The Rest.

"I have 15,000 patients...so my fantasy football team stinks."

"No, playing fantasy football doesn't count as exercise. No wonder you pulled a muscle getting up on the table."

'Dad, did the stork bring me or did you get me in fantasy draft?'

Football Fish

"Too bad for you that the judge rules in favor of dogs playing in varsity sorts."

'With my knowledge of math and science, maybe I could help establish world pece or end world hunger. Or even win my fantasy football league.'

"He left behind a wife, three kids, and the number one rated fantasy football quarterback."

"See - it works in my fantasy research league."

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

'My wife wanted me to get more active in sports, so I signed up or TWO fantasy football leagues.'

'This is better than magic beans, Jack. It's stock in the company that makes the magic beans.'

'The sports seasons never end, now with all his fantasy leagues.'

"Whoa! Now Philly has the bases loaded with one out!..."

'IN my fantasy league, we're not allowed to pick players from teams named after cats.'

Fantasy Football Awards: 'The trophy to the Monday morning quarterback with the widest end zone...'

"In Heaven it does."

"Gretzky shoots from three-point land for the extra point..." "Idiot"

"What should you do? Here's what you should do: invent a time machine, go back sixteen months, and convert everything to cash."

'In my fantasy retirement league, I'm having a great time.'

"We're updating stats for our fantasy football league."

'...That's Blaster verses Thor, should be a good match...'