Fantasy Competitor Gifts

World's tallest potato contest

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

I think this interleague play is getting out of hand.

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

Danth battle?

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

The Cricketer and the Golfer

The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

"I still thinking he's putting something unidentified on the ball."

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

Rugby Mad.

"Great. I guess he'll win again."

It's unlikely the "Deadly Sins" team from Hades University will go far in the basketball tourney. Wrath is suspended for arguing with the refs and sloth always skips practice. Pride puts too much pressure on himself and greed won't risk an injury that would blow his chances for a pro contract. Lust is distracted by the cheerleaders and Envy wants the shots all the other players are getting. Gluttony is the only player thriving in the tournament spotlight. Yeah, he just eats up all the atten

Played Wordle Fair and Square

Skateboard Olympics.

A Man mixing up his sports.

"Better - but it was still too obvious when you went for the pine tar under your hat."

'Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can pretend to beat up your dad!'

Later accounts would call it the Greatest Water Battle of All Time,

Tug the Toggle

Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can reach a higher plane of consciousness than your dad!

On the start position

Hi! Frank and Ernie, here, with the clock running down on another Superbowl! It's been a wild affair! I'll say! The seals and penguins kept starting the wave! And the zebras were throwing flags all over the place!...The Kangaroo kept jumping offsides and the octopus was called for holding. Eight times! And all on the same play! But no question the game's MVP is the electric eel...thirty-two carries and nobody touched him once! It was shocking!

Weapons of Mass Comparison

Who said, women are no-good at boxing?

'He was competitive to the very end.'

'This is my trophy wife...I won her in a bowling tournament.'

Two Astronauts Playing Pickleball on the Moon

Space Hopper Rodeo

National Fat Man Thong Competition

'You can't call it a fluke after forty-three wins.'