Fan Of White-collar Crime Stories T-Shirts

"I don't appreciate you questioning my integrity. Especially since I've skipped town and can't be there to defend it."

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

'Henderson makes money the old fashioned way - White collar crime.'

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

'They're very proud of me. I'm the first in my family to be convicted of a white-collar crime.'

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

"Paper or plastic?"

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

The old good-cop, psycho-cop routine.

"By Ned, you're right, inspector—the body has been moved."

Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

"I almost got away with it! Then somebody called in the SWAT team!"

'Tonight's special presentation, 'The Myth of the Mafia,' was made possible by a grant from the Gambino family.'

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

"It's a beautiful day except for the murders."

"Make it look like an accident"

Fake Counterfeit Money

"It doesn't look much like a 'witty painting' now, does it sir?"

The classic 'large scale corporate raider' eventually, they end up catching themselves!!

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

Handcuffs.

"Your Honor, I wish to introduce as Exhibit A this bullet with the victim's name on it."

'...Just goes to show you, you can't trust anyone.'