Fan Of Light-hearted Jokes Mugs

'Tell me father, why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be hell.'

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

A Golden Non-Retriever

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

Daffodil bulbs

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

Surreal Ale Pub.

"My reflexes are not what they used to be: This is how I catch birds now..."

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'Vacuums!'

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

"The Loyalty Card program has changed. Management now requires you to get a Loyalty Forehead Tattoo of the bar's logo."

'But seriously, folks... Who knows how many blondes it takes to screw in my latest invention?'

'What colour is a hiccup?'

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

"So tell me about your last poop."

Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 5

"Is the light bothering you?"

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'

Soldier With Mouse Ears.

Beach Attraction

'Hello? Animal control?'

"Doctor I think I'm a moth..."

Giving thanks.

"Dude, don't say it..."

I slept funny last night!

"I've forgotten your face but I remember your mask."

We couldn't help but notice, Mary, that you got a new fleece, and it's white as snow.