Family Roots Seeker Prints

'I didn't even know there WERE people like this!'

Frankenstein's Ancestry

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

'Let's make it cutting edge...with a traditional feel.'

"My dad was really good at showing me how to throw poo. He was just never any good at explaining exactly why I should be throwing it."

'There's no stigma in being brought up by apes - I was an adopted child too.'

"I love spending time together as a family. It brings us together. It makes us stronger. It helps us understand each other."

"I don't want to be a king like Dad - I want to be a pirate like Grandpa!"

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.'

Groundhog Day.

"This family who came with the frame made it clear they want no contact with me."

'I'm glad I don't like spinach because if I liked it I'd eat it and I hate the stuff!'

And remember son, never take your grandfather's picture down from the boardroom - it's bugged.

'You told me to put away the groceries.'

"Oh, come on, you must want to be remembered for something!"

'Last year Frank tried tracing back his roots but came back empty!'

Nobody famous wanted to live here.

'One day son, all this will be asset stripped.'

'A regular chip off the old bottle.'

Son, I'm adopted

'Your DNA test results are now in.'

Mr. Haredale bestows his niece's hand

"You cast a heavy shadow on your son."

Golda Meir.

"I didn't want the family business but ten years ago on take-your-child-to-work day my father wouldn't let me go home again."

Bob spent years tracking down his birth parents only to discover the awful truth. They lied. He had never been adopted.

"In my opinion, nothing promotes family harmony like caller I.D."

Ancestors.

"Dismantle the man cave and put the cushions back. . . my parents are here."

"Go to work, I'll find out why Mom is agitated."

"And this entire section is the obit of a very thorough genealogist."

The Big Book of Parent-Child Fights

Geneology Service: 'I'm afraid you fall into our 'better off not knowing' category....'

Following an especially difficult divorce.